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Why Divorce Mediation?
By Belinda Rachman, Esq.
You are thinking of divorce and worrying about how your children will fare. It is your job to protect them and you can chose to have a peaceful divorce. A mind works best, like a parachute, when it is open. There are very creative ways to divide property and to share children if both parties keep their eye on the prize – the well being of the children. They didn't ask for this drama and it is possible to shield them if the two of you work at it. The idea of "working at it" may sound odd to a couple who is about to break up just because their relationship isn't "working" but if you have children together your job will never end. There will be weddings and grandchildren and holidays for the rest of your life. If you start World War III now, with the kids caught in the middle, they are going to have to do a lot of duck and cover as your verbal bullets whiz over their heads.
Take a step back and focus on the children. No matter what perceived wrongs may or may not have happened to you, this is where you are right now and playing the blame game may make you feel better but it is not productive. A little rational thought instead of playing victim to your own feelings is what is needed most right now. The more you focus on anger, the more anger you will feel. Focus on the children now instead. Who has been the primary caretaker? If you have been a stay at home mom or dad, guess what, you will probably have to go back to work because you won't collect enough support to keep you living the life to which you have gotten accustomed. So if both of you are working then you really get a chance to look at a shared custody situation. It is hard to raise a child alone. Sometimes you really need a break for your own sake.
5/2 2/5. This is a very popular child sharing plan that gives the children a consistency that is dependable. One parent always takes Monday and Tuesday while the other parent always takes Wednesday and Thursday with weekends going back and forth. This schedule provides continuing contact with the children since there is never more than 5 days when they are away from you. Some times the weekend runs into Monday/Tuesday and sometime it runs into Wednesday/Thursday. Having big chunks of time with and without the children lets you plan a personal and work life that a lot of people enjoy.
On the financial side, if you have a bitter, uncooperative, self employed spouse, try collecting support. It is impossible unless they feel like paying you. This power struggle will
Our articles continue...
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probably result in a lot of uncollected support. The last thing you want is to go to war with a person like this. So now we talk about the most important decision you will make. The kind of divorce you have is up to you? Some people want to go in guns blazing. There are a LOT of attorneys who just love clients like that because they know they can make a lot of money off of you. But if you have a self employed spouse, you NEED them to cooperate. You know what your grandmother used to say about catching more flies with honey. A long, expensive, adversarial divorce will not produce a workable result when the side who owes the support is self employed. They will dig in their heals and do so much creative accounting, you will end up paying them. We create our lives out of our intention. That may sound counter intuitive. You didn't intend for your marriage to end, did you? Imagine your intention is like a muscle, the more you exercise it, the stronger it gets. If the two of you intend to break up with as much cooperation and generosity as possible BOTH of you will be better off, financially and emotionally. I always say the same thing to people, you can divide the pie two ways or four ways. Which way do you get the most? When you use divorce mediation, you cut out the lawyers. The average fees in California, when both sides have their own lawyers is $20,000 each, but the truth is that the more you have to lose the more your fees will be. California divorce attorneys are the only kinds of lawyers whose fees are protected by the equity in your home. They KNOW they are getting paid. Do you think the case will take longer or resolve itself quickly when you have a lot of assets? Human nature being what it is, certain attorneys will make sure the case does not settle until there is nothing left to fight about. If you want more details, read Charles Dickens' Bleak House. Nothing has changed since the 1800s. The overwhelming majority of people know what they have. Most couples know exactly what assets they have so there are no issues of secret Swiss bank accounts so why do their lawyers spend thousands of dollars taking depositions and serving subpoenas. Why buy more than you need? You would never do that with a house or a car? Why would you do it with a divorce? I am not saying is for everyone but if the two of you are decent people who just want out, no one is trying to hurt the other one and both of you are honest and reliable about money with enough honor to keep your word, then you are the perfect client for mediation. Divorce is a transition that has its challenges but an experienced mediator will help you in a way that is peaceful and respectful to both of you. Prices for are determined by expertise and where you are located so make several calls, interview several mediators to make sure you are fully informed. In my own practice the whole process, on average, takes between 4-7 hours but there is certain homework that must be done prior to working with me. Ask the mediator what percentage of their cases settle and how many meetings did it take. In California the average cost when both sides have their own attorney is $40,000 so whatever the mediator charges will be a tiny fraction of that. The financial benefits of are obvious but more importantly, you will be comfortable enough with your spouse to co-parent your children. This is the best gift you can give to your children. I ought to know, I was one of those kids caught in the middle. This is why I do what I do. Using instead of litigation brings some sanity back into the divorce process because the adversarial system destroys families. So ask yourself, what kind of divorce do you want? Peaceful divorce is an idea whose time has come. Article Directory: http://www.articlecube.com If you want more information about the differences between and litigation, please listen to a very informative audio on my websitewww.divorce-inaday.comYou only have one chance to have a "good" divorce so get the information you need to make an informed choice.
Here are some more mediation articles...
Preparation For Child Custody Court Ordered Mediation
By Child Custody Secrets
In cases where it is child custody is contested, family lawyers therapists and mediators can help get parents in this difficult situations, it is necessary that the plan developed is child centered Read more...
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Negotiation Tips For A Buyer's Market
By Bob Corcoran
"It is not necessary to change. Survival is not mandatory." W. Edwards DemingYou should be used to it by now - the buyer's market has settled into his big, cushy, leather, easy chair and he's Read more...
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How To Handle Angry Consumers
By Alexander Gordon
When you run a business and deal with dozens of customers on a daily basis, there is always a chance that some of them will not be satisfied with your service. There will be accusations, raised Read more...
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Broadprospect Launches The World's First Network Of Business
By Broadprospect Inc., Fri Dec 9th
You have permission to publish this article electronically or inprint, free of charge, as long as the bylines are included. Acourtesy copy of your publication would be Read more...
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| facilitation at a glance news: |
Part of Dallas-based Coach America sold out of bankruptcy
Stagecoach Group PLC, a Scottish bus company, announced Friday that it is buying part of Dallas-based Coach America Inc. for $134.2 million.
Stagecoach said the acquisition includes businesses in Texas and California, and will allow the expansion of Megabus, Stagecoach?s Chicago-based bus network.
Coach America filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection in January, and the deal requires Bankruptcy Court approval.
Stagecoach said the nine acquisitions include facilities in Dallas, San Antonio,...<div class="feedflare">
<a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=7N-s1Nxl4t8:8VoAlxb7rT0:yIl2AUoC8zA"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?d=yIl2AUoC8zA" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=7N-s1Nxl4t8:8VoAlxb7rT0:V_sGLiPBpWU"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?i=7N-s1Nxl4t8:8VoAlxb7rT0:V_sGLiPBpWU" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=7N-s1Nxl4t8:8VoAlxb7rT0:F7zBnMyn0Lo"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?i=7N-s1Nxl4t8:8VoAlxb7rT0:F7zBnMyn0Lo" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=7N-s1Nxl4t8:8VoAlxb7rT0:qj6IDK7rITs"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?d=qj6IDK7rITs" border="0"></img></a>
</div>Texas unemployment rate drops to 6.9 percent
The Texas unemployment rate fell to 6.9 percent in April, down from 7 percent in March and 8 percent a year ago.
The state added 13,200 seasonally adjusted nonfarm jobs in April, the Texas Workforce Commission said, and saw an increase of 225,800 jobs over the past year.
Unemployment in the Dallas-Fort Worth-Arlington market was at 6.5 percent, down from 7 percent in March and 7.5 percent in April 2011.
?The Texas economy continues to add jobs, with 10 of 11 major industries growing over the...<div class="feedflare">
<a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=7Awo1HERUHQ:Q4Gcg4bKv3g:yIl2AUoC8zA"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?d=yIl2AUoC8zA" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=7Awo1HERUHQ:Q4Gcg4bKv3g:V_sGLiPBpWU"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?i=7Awo1HERUHQ:Q4Gcg4bKv3g:V_sGLiPBpWU" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=7Awo1HERUHQ:Q4Gcg4bKv3g:F7zBnMyn0Lo"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?i=7Awo1HERUHQ:Q4Gcg4bKv3g:F7zBnMyn0Lo" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=7Awo1HERUHQ:Q4Gcg4bKv3g:qj6IDK7rITs"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?d=qj6IDK7rITs" border="0"></img></a>
</div>American Realty Advisors buy luxe Farmers Branch apartment community
<img src='http://assets.bizjournals.com/dallas/news/portofino%20exterior*100.jpg?v=1'>Illinois-based The Marquette Companies has joined California-based American Realty Advisors in a venture that has bought Portofino Luxury Apartments at 11601 Lago Vista W in Farmers Branch for an undisclosed sum.
The 224-unit, four-story luxury apartment community will be held as an investment.
"We see Texas as an area ripe with high-quality investment opportunity," said Darren Sloniger, managing director of acquisitions for The Marquette Companies, which will serve as the property manager of the...<div class="feedflare">
<a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=-GlDUNO3a-I:034NZBjqBaI:yIl2AUoC8zA"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?d=yIl2AUoC8zA" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=-GlDUNO3a-I:034NZBjqBaI:V_sGLiPBpWU"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?i=-GlDUNO3a-I:034NZBjqBaI:V_sGLiPBpWU" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=-GlDUNO3a-I:034NZBjqBaI:F7zBnMyn0Lo"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?i=-GlDUNO3a-I:034NZBjqBaI:F7zBnMyn0Lo" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=-GlDUNO3a-I:034NZBjqBaI:qj6IDK7rITs"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?d=qj6IDK7rITs" border="0"></img></a>
</div>Stockdale buys Falk Fabrics retail building in Uptown
<img src='http://assets.bizjournals.com/dallas/news/mckinney%20avenue%20sale*100.jpg?v=1'>Dallas-based Stockdale Investment Group Inc. has acquired the historic Falk Fabrics retail building at 2633 McKinney Ave. in Uptown Dallas for an undisclosed sum.
The building has seven retail stores fronting McKinney Avenue and Boll Street in Dallas.
Kenneth Pratt and Joe Pastora represented Stockdale Investment Group. The seller was Uptown/McKinney Retail LLC.
Stockdale is proud to add the property to its portfolio and expects to see a growing Dallas real estate market, Pratt said.<div class="feedflare">
<a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=EJ78AHqkl_4:bgOaz8p4njI:yIl2AUoC8zA"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?d=yIl2AUoC8zA" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=EJ78AHqkl_4:bgOaz8p4njI:V_sGLiPBpWU"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?i=EJ78AHqkl_4:bgOaz8p4njI:V_sGLiPBpWU" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=EJ78AHqkl_4:bgOaz8p4njI:F7zBnMyn0Lo"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?i=EJ78AHqkl_4:bgOaz8p4njI:F7zBnMyn0Lo" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=EJ78AHqkl_4:bgOaz8p4njI:qj6IDK7rITs"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?d=qj6IDK7rITs" border="0"></img></a>
</div>Railroad Commission candidates in their own words
Who knew being a regulator was so desirable?
The opportunity to join the Texas Railroad Commission, which oversees the state?s oil and gas industry, has drawn 10 Republicans and one Democrat into the May 29 primary elections.
Four Republicans, including incumbent appointee Barry Smitherman of Houston, are running for the final two years of an unexpired term. Six Republicans from across the state are running for a six-year term.
We profiled the race in this week?s newspaper, but didn?t have...<div class="feedflare">
<a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=UoAsAVt6yIQ:WtAuIDY1DZs:yIl2AUoC8zA"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?d=yIl2AUoC8zA" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=UoAsAVt6yIQ:WtAuIDY1DZs:V_sGLiPBpWU"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?i=UoAsAVt6yIQ:WtAuIDY1DZs:V_sGLiPBpWU" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=UoAsAVt6yIQ:WtAuIDY1DZs:F7zBnMyn0Lo"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?i=UoAsAVt6yIQ:WtAuIDY1DZs:F7zBnMyn0Lo" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=UoAsAVt6yIQ:WtAuIDY1DZs:qj6IDK7rITs"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?d=qj6IDK7rITs" border="0"></img></a>
</div>
Part of Dallas-based Coach America sold out of bankruptcy
Stagecoach Group PLC, a Scottish bus company, announced Friday that it is buying part of Dallas-based Coach America Inc. for $134.2 million.
Stagecoach said the acquisition includes businesses in Texas and California, and will allow the expansion of Megabus, Stagecoach?s Chicago-based bus network.
Coach America filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection in January, and the deal requires Bankruptcy Court approval.
Stagecoach said the nine acquisitions include facilities in Dallas, San Antonio,...<div class="feedflare">
<a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=7N-s1Nxl4t8:8VoAlxb7rT0:yIl2AUoC8zA"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?d=yIl2AUoC8zA" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=7N-s1Nxl4t8:8VoAlxb7rT0:V_sGLiPBpWU"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?i=7N-s1Nxl4t8:8VoAlxb7rT0:V_sGLiPBpWU" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=7N-s1Nxl4t8:8VoAlxb7rT0:F7zBnMyn0Lo"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?i=7N-s1Nxl4t8:8VoAlxb7rT0:F7zBnMyn0Lo" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=7N-s1Nxl4t8:8VoAlxb7rT0:qj6IDK7rITs"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?d=qj6IDK7rITs" border="0"></img></a>
</div>Texas unemployment rate drops to 6.9 percent
The Texas unemployment rate fell to 6.9 percent in April, down from 7 percent in March and 8 percent a year ago.
The state added 13,200 seasonally adjusted nonfarm jobs in April, the Texas Workforce Commission said, and saw an increase of 225,800 jobs over the past year.
Unemployment in the Dallas-Fort Worth-Arlington market was at 6.5 percent, down from 7 percent in March and 7.5 percent in April 2011.
?The Texas economy continues to add jobs, with 10 of 11 major industries growing over the...<div class="feedflare">
<a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=7Awo1HERUHQ:Q4Gcg4bKv3g:yIl2AUoC8zA"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?d=yIl2AUoC8zA" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=7Awo1HERUHQ:Q4Gcg4bKv3g:V_sGLiPBpWU"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?i=7Awo1HERUHQ:Q4Gcg4bKv3g:V_sGLiPBpWU" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=7Awo1HERUHQ:Q4Gcg4bKv3g:F7zBnMyn0Lo"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?i=7Awo1HERUHQ:Q4Gcg4bKv3g:F7zBnMyn0Lo" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=7Awo1HERUHQ:Q4Gcg4bKv3g:qj6IDK7rITs"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?d=qj6IDK7rITs" border="0"></img></a>
</div>American Realty Advisors buy luxe Farmers Branch apartment community
<img src='http://assets.bizjournals.com/dallas/news/portofino%20exterior*100.jpg?v=1'>Illinois-based The Marquette Companies has joined California-based American Realty Advisors in a venture that has bought Portofino Luxury Apartments at 11601 Lago Vista W in Farmers Branch for an undisclosed sum.
The 224-unit, four-story luxury apartment community will be held as an investment.
"We see Texas as an area ripe with high-quality investment opportunity," said Darren Sloniger, managing director of acquisitions for The Marquette Companies, which will serve as the property manager of the...<div class="feedflare">
<a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=-GlDUNO3a-I:034NZBjqBaI:yIl2AUoC8zA"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?d=yIl2AUoC8zA" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=-GlDUNO3a-I:034NZBjqBaI:V_sGLiPBpWU"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?i=-GlDUNO3a-I:034NZBjqBaI:V_sGLiPBpWU" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=-GlDUNO3a-I:034NZBjqBaI:F7zBnMyn0Lo"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?i=-GlDUNO3a-I:034NZBjqBaI:F7zBnMyn0Lo" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=-GlDUNO3a-I:034NZBjqBaI:qj6IDK7rITs"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?d=qj6IDK7rITs" border="0"></img></a>
</div>Stockdale buys Falk Fabrics retail building in Uptown
<img src='http://assets.bizjournals.com/dallas/news/mckinney%20avenue%20sale*100.jpg?v=1'>Dallas-based Stockdale Investment Group Inc. has acquired the historic Falk Fabrics retail building at 2633 McKinney Ave. in Uptown Dallas for an undisclosed sum.
The building has seven retail stores fronting McKinney Avenue and Boll Street in Dallas.
Kenneth Pratt and Joe Pastora represented Stockdale Investment Group. The seller was Uptown/McKinney Retail LLC.
Stockdale is proud to add the property to its portfolio and expects to see a growing Dallas real estate market, Pratt said.<div class="feedflare">
<a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=EJ78AHqkl_4:bgOaz8p4njI:yIl2AUoC8zA"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?d=yIl2AUoC8zA" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=EJ78AHqkl_4:bgOaz8p4njI:V_sGLiPBpWU"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?i=EJ78AHqkl_4:bgOaz8p4njI:V_sGLiPBpWU" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=EJ78AHqkl_4:bgOaz8p4njI:F7zBnMyn0Lo"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?i=EJ78AHqkl_4:bgOaz8p4njI:F7zBnMyn0Lo" border="0"></img></a> <a href="http://feeds.bizjournals.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?a=EJ78AHqkl_4:bgOaz8p4njI:qj6IDK7rITs"><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~ff/bizj_dallas?d=qj6IDK7rITs" border="0"></img></a>
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a form of alternative dispute resolution where a neutral mediator helps the two parties to agree on a resolution to their case.
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